Posts tagged love
Living Loved, A Mindset

A woman can read a love letter from her husband or listen to her mom rave about how proud she is of her daughter for coming so far, for achieving so much. However, it’s up to us, as that woman on the other end of the affection, what we do with this love being laid out before us. If I think I am undeserving of the affections of others, I won’t let the positive words of those who care for me shape who I am. It’s these words I don’t let reach the depths of my heart that won’t be able to project me forward into who I want to become.

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Confidence-Inspiring Affirmations Every Woman Needs

Do you know that feeling when it seems as if the world could care less about you? Yeah, I’ve been there recently—it’s not easy. It can feel like you’re unimportant or a nuisance. That describes my recent life experiences to a T. Despite that, I know there are truths I’ve been ignoring—I’ve let the shortcomings of others define my worth. This is not how we are called to live, girlfriend. We are made for more—more than the labels and lies this world forces upon us. Frankly, we are called to live loved. 

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Love is a Choice

Love. We all want to feel loved. We want that feeling of joy and acceptance when someone else chooses us and wants to spend time with us. We want the tingles and the goosebumps of new love. We want the steadiness and the consistency of old love. We want love to be easy. We want to wake up in the morning and FEEL loved. It is one thing to FEEL loved, but it is another thing to KNOW you are loved. I KNOW, in my head, God loves me. I have been told it over and over and over since the day I was born. But, sometimes, I don’t FEEL loved. Things happen in life that cause me to FEEL unloved and forgotten.

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It’s Time to Truly Love Yourself

Feeling loved is one of life’s greatest accomplishments. Whether it’s from a family member, friend or a significant other, love is the one thing that keeps the world spinning. Finding the strength within your heart to give your love to others can oftentimes be too easy, but we do it because it’s what feels right and makes us feel whole. But, what about loving yourself and being able to confidently walk in the direction of your dreams because you are confident in who you are, and you love yourself whole-heartedly? That’s an entirely different story. Everyone has been there.

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Pursuing Honest Reflections of Love

Someday, you have to stop caring. You have to give up, and you have to move on. You have to stop looking to others to see your reflection. Someday, you have to stop looking at all the ways in which you need to be fixed and start to love exactly who you are. It’s not easy not to care. People are quick to provide their input and judgements, and you’ll never run out of critiques if you go looking for them. In the most formative times of life, you can forget who you are and spend your time obsessing over who everyone thinks you are. It’s a run of faceless days ruled by the labels given to you. 

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Series Introduction: Live Loved

It’s nice to be loved, wouldn’t you agree? There is comfort and belonging found in the company of someone who truly loves you. When surrounded by people who deeply care for you, facing the world feels easier because you’re supported. But, with love, hurt almost always steals the goodness and joy that exists because of love. You see, no matter how deep another’s love burns for you, shortcomings and imperfections of our humanity will always hinder our perception of unconditional, real and pure love. That’s the beauty in knowing this truth—before you could earn love, it was already very much yours. You’ve been tirelessly working to grasp a hold of something that’s been in your possession for your entire life.

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How Can You Love What's Been Lost?

I’m at a loss. I really am. When I sat down to write this, I didn’t think there would be an issue. Self-love? That’s simple. There are hundreds of step-by-step articles on how to love the person you are. But, the more I think about it, the more I realize I don’t love me at all. This is my fourth attempt at writing something, and it’s a struggle. Respect, admiration even, is felt, but I do not love the woman I see in the mirror. Everything about me has changed since becoming a wife and mother, and I’m not sure who I am. I’m not sure what I look like without my husband and son. I feel as lost as I did the first time I went blonde in middle school. My hair was mustard, and I was blindly searching for identity. I have wandered so deep into my roles at home I’m almost certain I’ve given myself away.

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To the Girl Who Can't Love Herself... [An Audio Letter]

At what point in your life did you first feel uncomfortable in your own body? Do you remember the very first moment you were embarrassed with yourself? Or, when did you first feel the pressure to look and be like everyone else? How about that first moment you looked into the mirror, like you’d always done before, but instantly everything changed? When you entered this world, you felt no shame, no fear, and there was certainly no judgment. Your itty-bitty frame, delicate and soft, was absolute perfection. The way you arrived into existence was a bonafide miracle, and that’s damn right beautiful. So, what happened to her?

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Love Yourself First: How to be Your Own Biggest Supporter

February is all about love. It's the month of course when we celebrate Valentine's Day and can be a very special time for couples, but you might be dreading it just a bit if you're single. Or perhaps you're in a relationship but never understood why you had to rush out and buy all the bouquets of flowers, chocolate candies and giant teddy bears you can find (not to mention the fact that many Valentine's Day displays seem to go up in stores right after Christmas)! If you're not so into the holiday or even if you are, maybe it's just a good time to shower yourself with some love and TLC — a reminder to take time for yourself. In that case, here's some tips from me to you. Self love for me is two parts — actually loving and appreciating yourself internally and secondly, the outward actions you do to keep yourself happy, healthy and full of love.  

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Learn to Say ‘No’ and Put Yourself First

This year, I have made one resolution: put myself first more often. Sometimes self-love is easier said than done. I would love to get a biweekly mani/pedi or read more books but finding the time to do these things can be hard when you have commitments to your loved ones and your job. This last year, I found myself more stressed than I had ever been before due to the fact that I wasn’t taking enough time to decompress and enjoy my time off. We’re almost a month into the new year and although it’s been difficult to change my ways, I’m learning to take more time to gather my thoughts and do the things I love.

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Series Introduction: Self-Love

When I look back at the girl I was in high school — no let’s be real, sixth grade — my heart breaks for her. She had absolutely no love for herself. Eventually, I grew up and found room in my heart for the woman God created in me. Now that I’ve gotten to know her, I’m never letting her go. I admit, I still find imperfections in menial things, but nevertheless, my cup overflows with self-love.  As we step into February, a month dedicated to overly romantic acts of love, I feel it’s important to remember to shower ourselves with affirmations — and, while we’re at it, chocolates and flowers too.

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Grateful in Love

"I'm sorry you have to love me." These words have fallen from both mine and my spouse's lips more than once. Nothing makes you feel more challenged and more inadequate than taking on the responsibility of jumping into a lifelong commitment with someone. I never saw life coming when we fell for each other. It all looked like bliss. But Disney lied, y'all! Being in love is hard, and I have yet to meet my fairy godmother or get my animals to talk back to me. Feeling love is simple but living that love is a lesson in humility, compassion, patience, and growth.

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Curbing Loneliness with Fake Love

I allowed my loneliness to lower my standards when it came to men. I mended my heartbreak with any bit of attention that would come my way — it didn’t take much for a guy to mysteriously wrap me around his sneaky little finger. But, as you can imagine, any kind of relationship built on a rocky foundation of settling and fragility never ends well. I continuously set myself up for rejection, hurt and loss of interest. In the midst of my loneliness, I allowed myself to experience unhealthy bouts of fake “love” because in my head it was better than being alone.

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The Prayer of the Heart

I still remember the last time I held his hand and watched him sleep. Told him I loved him, not knowing when I would see him again. Although it might seem like I'm talking about a breakup, and this same situation has happened before in my love life, I'm talking about another kind of love. Almost four years ago, I lost my grandfather. Growing up, my dad's parents were a second set of parents for my brother and me. When my parents needed a well-deserved break, for all of our recitals and sporting games, every holiday and birthday and really any day in between, my grandparents were always there.

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The Day My Marriage Broke My Heart

I remember sitting on the bed, six months pregnant with our second son, feeling as if my world had stopped. This person who had promised to love me for the rest of our lives just told me he wouldn’t choose me. I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed. My heart was broken that day. My dreams for the future seemed so very far away. What was I supposed to do? I felt so very, very unloved. And yet, I had made a commitment to love this man for the rest of my life. How could I love someone who didn’t love me back? I made the choice to honor my covenant, even when it hurt so very much. Even when I wanted to leave. Even when he wasn’t honoring his.

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Series Video Introduction: True Beauty

For the month of August, Crowned Chics is taking a step back to question society's idea of beauty and instead, replacing it with a refreshing message — embrace you and all of your flaws. Founder, Nikki Michelle Charnstrom sits before the camera makeup-free to introduce this new series to you in a real, heartfelt conversation.

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A Glimpse of Eternal Love in Earthly Ways

I pondered the thought, “What relationship in my life is worth sharing?” And to be honest I was more so stumped because every relationship I have ever had in my life is vital to the transformation I have gone through to get me to where I am today. Friendships have turned into sisterhood. Enemies have taught me how to love even the tough people. Family members have encouraged me through all the steps of this life. My boyfriend has shown me pure, tangible love. So where do I begin? How do I pinpoint a single relationship that has shaped me when they all have?

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A Love Story Many (Single) Years in the Making

As women, our desire for love is undeniable. Even at such a young age, before we’ve even lost all of our baby teeth, we fantasize about boys and marriage. It’s nothing to be ashamed of — it’s just how we’re wired. However, society has its own views on relationships and at times, we might feel pressured to measure up. Although, not every woman gives societal norms the power they ruthlessly demand. Christina Vincent, a 37-year-old from Springfield, Missouri, trusted in the Lord’s plan when it came to her love story — rather than taking cues from an impatient world.

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True Love Actually Isn't a Fairytale

The kind of love we see plastered across the media and portrayed in the entertainment industry isn’t at all what a real relationship is like. It is because of these misconstrued ideas of love that often times we think anything less than means we’re settling — or simply with the wrong person. We base our “perfect match” on the love stories we see in the movies and think the relationship will come easy — like in a sunset on the beach, hand in hand, forever in love kind of way.

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4 Steps to Showing Others Grace

When someone you love betrays your trust or disregards your feelings, it hurts like no other. Relationships aren’t perfect, yet we hold them to this impossible standard of excellence. Why do we continue to set our expectations so high when it comes to our loved ones? We know there will come a time when they will let us down again, so how can we relieve the pressure?

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